install theme

cramp:

someone really needs to find that plane already

mishasminions:

halalloli:

mishasminions:

I have this weird reaction to minced garlic. Whenever I eat it, I have really horrible farts—weirdly awful. I had eaten a lot of it, and we got on a flight—packed flight—completely packed, and it was one of those situations where, you know, I was on the window side, and I didn’t want to get up, I figured I’ll—I felt something building up is what I’m trying to say. And I just let a little bit out, just little by little.

Long story short, I farted, and the guy behind me fainted. A flight attendant came over and splashed water on his face and sort of resuscitated him. And his wife or girlfriend goes, “I think I smell some gas”, and they said, “Ma’am, that’s impossible, all the fuel on the plane is stored in the wings so there’s none of it that comes anywhere near the fuselage. Absolutely impossible for there to be a gas leak.” They let it go.

About an hour and a half into the flight, I thought, “I’ll be more careful this time”. I farted again, the guy faints again. Flight attendants came, and his girlfriend says, “Somebody let out some gas”. They said, “Ma’am, we told you the gas cannot leak”. The woman sitting next to them said, “No, no, somebody has to go to the bathroom”

there’s no way this man is real.he can’t be human. he just can’t

YES. OBVIOUSLY TO PRODUCE FARTS THAT CAUSE PEOPLE TO FAINT, THAT’S INCREDIBLY UNNATURAL.

YOU MIGHT EVEN SAY, HE’S SUPERNATURAL

creamteasandjammydodgers:


if this scene isn’t in The Winter Soldier I will protest

creamteasandjammydodgers:

if this scene isn’t in The Winter Soldier I will protest

(Source: theplacethatevolutionforgot)

"Congratulations! That’s great! Number one movie in America!" (x)

(Source: gilmckinney)

lostintroylerland:

Imagine if trees gave off wifi signals. We would be planting so many trees and we’d probably save the planet too.

Too bad they only produce the oxygen we breathe

ishouldnotbearousedbythis:

lmao-okay-no:

aclumsywaytofallinlove:

THIS 

this is my life 

What is this guys name ??

Um, I’m not a detective, but something tells me it might be Daniel Simonsen.

(Source: petersdinklage)

blue-eyed-hanji:

huffley6:

silence4us:

captainamerica-in-middle-earth:

catherinecasper:

I love Tumblr.

The red light one kills me every time

I lost my shit at the red light one.

I wasn’t going to reblog this until I got to the red light. I am laughing so hard.

always reblog the red light story

It got stuck on his cloak!!!!!!! HP isn’t a thief duh it would turn invisible if he was trying to eat it

tom-sits-like-a-whore:

disneybombshell:

ifeelcapretty:

The American collegiate system in one gif set

it hurts

the saddest part is that this isn’t even really a joke

(Source: sandandglass)