So I walked into the dentist this morning. My dentist asked me how my weekend was. I said “Good, I watched Captain America last night. I really liked it.” And my dentist says “Oh, my son is in that movie.” At first I thought he was joking but then I realized
if i was famous i’d just tour around the country without telling anyone and go to random college campuses late at night, and i’d wait until i saw one person walking by themselves and i’d walk behind them and put my hands over their eyes and say guess who and when they turned around it’d be me and they’d be like omg and then i’d say “no one will ever believe you” and i’d just sprint off into the moonlight
So today this guy accidentally hit me with the door when he was walking out of a classroom and instead of saying sorry he just looked me over and said ‘pretty cute’ and walked away . And then I realized . I literally just got hit on . The pun is greater than the pain .